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The 8 Questions for Better Sex

Or a scalable and highly effective planning system for designing more intense sexual experiences and relationships

The Questions

What is my intention?

What are my fears?

How will it End and how will it Begin?

What are my risks?

What are my relevant limits and what are likely hot buttons / triggers?

How will we maintain communication during it?

Will anyone else will be involved and how?

What happens afterwards?

Then summarise everything with your partner and have fun!

HOW to use these Questions?

The intention of these questions is to bring people together to have fun, by going inside and understanding what you like, accepting yourself and developing fluency in sharing it with a partner so you can both grow closer and have fun.

By Yourself - The best thing is to practice answering these questions yourself a few times alone before involving a partner, for easy and simple practice. First commit to total honesty with yourself. You don't have to like everything that comes up, but you also don't have to DO any of it either, its a self exploration exercise and you must be completely honest with yourself. You do not have to share these answers with anyone.

Close your eyes, eliminate distractions and allow your mind to wander as you ask yourself these questions and write down the first thing that comes up inside you. Thank your unconscious and feel proud that you are connecting with it in a healthy way.

With a Partner - You are discussing sex or sexual play. A partner volunteers to go first, answering a question, then their partner answers the same question. Use as much detail as you can, and hold nothing back - be completely honest and open with your partner. Move through the questions, connecting with each other and exploring and eliciting

WHEN to use these Questions?

These questions can be used to plan any scene, any sex play, or to assist in planning any kind of relationship - casual, short term or long. They are great as a self-exploration exercise to learn to accept what you like (and why) so that you can begin to share these with a trusted partner and have fun, together. Credit for the original Idea came from The Heart of Dominance by Anton Fulmen. Excellent book!